


Eien

by space_in_between



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-01-15
Packaged: 2019-03-05 06:14:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13381854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/space_in_between/pseuds/space_in_between
Summary: Seungcheol isn’t sure which one is funnier: reuniting with someone who once hurt him and left, or realizing that the old feeling lingers longer than he thought.





	Eien

**Author's Note:**

> I'm probably the only one here (on earth???) who still ships docheol WITH ALL MY HEART (please tell me if you see my brothers & sisters...) so this fic is unquestionably very self-indulgent. I've had the rough draft on my notebook from years ago and it'd be a waste not to bring it to life, so here it is. Enjoy! :)

“I’m sorry, Seungcheol-nim. I’m _really_ sorry.”

Seungcheol looks up at his band’s manager, frowning. Starting a day with an apology (and even calling him _nim_ , which is a super rare occasion) only means two things: either the manager made a mistake during a meeting or the higher-up people from the management decide to fuck things up for Seungcheol’s band. Judging from the expression, Seungcheol has a hunch that it can be worse than both options checked.

“Did someone from my team die?” Seungcheol asks. His manager blinks—surprised at the sudden question—and quickly shake his head.

“No, I mean, this is not about someone’s death. But maybe it will, later,” his manager clears his throat. “Remember the higher-ups called me to discuss about Spear Kings’ new release? We were talking about your music video, and we’re supposed to meet the lead actor tomorrow, someone who will be your partner for the video. But they didn’t ask me anything about my preference and it’s not that my preference is important, but they also didn’t ask about _your_ preference for that matter, and I did not have the obligation to tell them about this without being asked because it’s rude—”

“Chan, Lee Chan, for god’s sake,” Seungcheol cuts off his manager’s rants and presses a hand on his temple. “Say it slowly. And please, go straight to the point. I don’t seem to understand what you’ve said earlier, what does my and your preference about lead actor have anything to do with our new music video?”

Chan takes a deep breath before answering, “Because they will be your love interest, Seungcheol. And you’ll spend some—probably a lot—of time with them to build the chemistry before we start shooting. I thought you knew that much?”

“I _knew_ that,” Seungcheol says, the frown on his forehead from the beginning of this conversation hasn’t lessened a bit. “And we’d never had a talk about preference for this matter before, hadn’t we? Why are you sorry about it now?”

Chan sighs, looking at Seungcheol with an apologetic look. “The lead actor for your new music video is... Jang Doyoon.”

Seungcheol’s heart skips a beat.

_And it hurts._

 

 

*****

 

 

Choi Seungcheol and Jang Doyoon are both excellent in the field, as a musician and an actor respectively. Seungcheol leads a successful pop-rock band called Spear Kings while Doyoon fills the television drama slots with his exceptional acting. Not a lot of people in this industry know about how these men—who seem to walk in completely different path—were once met, fell in love, and stayed as lovers for five years.

Five years. Seungcheol devoted his five fucking years to love and cherish Doyoon completely, forgetting about the risks and consequences he’s got to face with a man as his secret lover. Seungcheol didn’t care how his head manager was _that_ close to chop his head off for admitting he and Doyoon were dating, he didn’t even care if he had to step out of Spear Kings if the secret was blown to media.

Seungcheol thought love was enough to make Doyoon stay when their relationship was in a storm. Seungcheol gave his all to fight his love for Doyoon, but Doyoon left without even telling Seungcheol why, and Seungcheol was too tired to ask. It’s been two years since then, but the scar always feels like new.

“So? Are you okay with meeting Doyoon-hyung again?”

Seungcheol stops strumming his guitar when Soonyoung pokes him with the question. He shoots the other guitarist a stern look, but Soonyoung just shrugs. “I was just asking. You know, since Doyoon-hyung and the rest of us are still in a good term, but we honestly don’t know about you. And we know how things were for you and him, so it’s just me being cautious. I don’t want the kids to pull the wrong act before seeing him tomorrow and it affects your meeting.”

Seungcheol smiles at that. “Thanks for your concern, Soonyoung. Doyoon and I are over, and I’ll try to deal with it professionally. We meet for work, after all. My personal feelings have nothing to do with this.”

Soonyoung walks up and gives Seungcheol a friendly pat on the back. “Don’t be so hard on yourself, you’ve had it rough since two years ago. Sometimes heartbreak means to give your heart a break, hyung.”

Seungcheol chuckles, “Yeah, thanks, man.”

“I’ll get the others and we can check the overall harmony before we go with the music video version!” Soonyoung waves and heads out of the room, leaving Seungcheol alone with their equipment.

 _Sometimes heartbreak means to give your heart a break_ , Seungcheol repeats Soonyoung’s words on his head over and over. He didn’t date anyone after he broke up with Doyoon, had never found anyone suitable enough to fill up the vacancy Doyoon left inside him. Was that counted as a break? Or was that because he still couldn’t get over Doyoon? Seungcheol doesn’t know—he doesn’t want to know. He was hurt, but he couldn’t hate Doyoon let alone forgetting memories of all the time they were together.

“Hyung, we’re here!”

Soonyoung—guitarist, Mingyu—drummer, and Minghao—bassist enter the room along with their manager. His manager pats his shoulder gently, but he doesn’t say anything. Seungcheol knows; they want him to act like usual for they won’t say a thing about his and Doyoon’s thing in the past.

“I’m so pumped to do this,” Mingyu rubs his palms together and grabs his drumsticks, shouting at the leader. “Seungcheol-hyung, come on!”

“Okay, okay.” Seungcheol laughs as he slings his guitar strap over his shoulder carefully. “Spear Kings, let’s make some noise!”

 

 

*****

 

 

Doyoon looks the same as the last time Seungcheol remembers him. Still a gorgeous man with gorgeous smile and Seungcheol knows his eyes are turning into the shape of crescents behind those shades.

“Spear Kings’ members are such attractive kings, aren’t they? There’s only one of you here but you gather quite a lot of crowd over there.” Doyoon says, still smiling. He gestures the other parties to take a seat—there are six people including him in this meeting. Doyoon, Seungcheol, Seungcheol’s company’s representative, director in the charge of the video, Hong Jisoo—Spear King’s head manager, and Yoon Junghan, Seungcheol’s company’s fashion director.

“Of course, they are kings for a reason,” Junghan laughs. “Doyoonie, it’s been so long and you’re still pretty as always.”

“Thanks to my dear friend who gave a lot of useful advices to my personal stylist,” Doyoon replies with a laugh. Seungcheol realizes Doyoon’s laugh sounds just the same with two years ago before everything went disarray, and his heart feels like it is being squeezed a bit. “How are you, Seungcheol?”

Seungcheol lifts his head quicker than he should, probably, because everyone is looking at him weirdly right now.

“Uh, I’m fine,” he answers hesitantly. “You seem fine too, Doyoon.”

Doyoon takes off his sunglasses and smiles at Seungcheol. It’s a faint one, not the usual twinkling and crescent-eyes one. “Yes, well, I guess? Ah, and I’d like to thank everyone for having me here, it will be such an honor for me to work with you.”

“We are the one with the honor to work with you. Who knows it would be so hard to get the time of national’s most successful young actor?” Jisoo takes the lead of the conversation and pulls out some papers from his portfolio. “We’re here to talk about the concept with the director, the styling with Junghan, signing the contract with our company representative, and we’ll decide how long the two of you as lead actors will be given the time to prepare yourselves and build the chemistry. I’m sure these procedures are familiar for you, right?”

Doyoon and Seungcheol nod, and Jisoo continues with more instructions. Seungcheol doesn’t feel like following the conversation with all his attention is on Doyoon now.

_How could you live just fine for the last two years?_

 

 

 

About three hours later, only Seungcheol and Doyoon remain on the seat with the rest of them already leaving the place with various excuses. The luxurious restaurant suddenly feels so spacious and the atmosphere is suffocating—but none of them makes a move.

“So... what does Junghan mean he wants us to sort things out before we start shooting?” Doyoon asks after what feels like an hour. He doesn’t look puzzled with the situation, so perhaps he’s expected this change of the event to actually happen.

“It means Junghan is a bitch and he wants us to leave him with Jisoo alone as soon as possible,” Seungcheol says, rolling his eyes. “That friend of yours is dating our head manager and he’s such a possessive boyfriend it scares us. Pretty sure he would put a leash around Jisoo’s neck if he could.”

“I see.” Doyoon chuckles. “Then how about you, Mr. Spear Kings’ leader? Are you dating someone too, at this moment?”

Seungcheol’s body stiffens. “Why do you ask?”

Doyoon shrugs, “Just making sure no one will come raging at me for having their boyfriend does intimate scenes with me for the video. I’m talking based on my personal experience, so I’m giving you a heads up.”

Seungcheol takes a deep breath. “I don’t have a lover,” he says diplomatically. “But even if I do, it’s none of your business, isn’t it? I don’t have any interest to know if you’re in a relationship of not, after all.”

“True,” Doyoon answers calmly. “I told you I spoke based on my personal experience. I just don’t want to get into trouble for working with South Korea’s Most Desired Man, and being your _lover_ , for that matter.”

“Jang Doyoon.” Seungcheol calls, looking straight at Doyoon’s eyes. “Stop talking to me like we never had any business before. _You_ left me, if any of us should act like a foreigner towards the other that should be me.”

“I thought you didn’t like bringing up your private life to work?” Doyoon asks. “Then what, you want me to be jealous if you’ve got someone else to replace me? What if I said yes, what if I said no?”

Seungcheol doesn’t answer. The staring battle between him and Doyoon doesn’t last long because Doyoon suddenly stands up and packs his stuffs on the table.

“I guess our meeting ends here as we don’t have anything else to discuss.” Doyoon says hurriedly. He just wants to leave this place right now, so Seungcheol doesn’t have any chance to peek on his still bleeding heart after they broke up two years ago. “This concept must be a piece of cake for you, Seungcheol. We won’t need a lot of time to master the storyline and bring it to life on the scene. We...” Doyoon pauses to take a breath, “...won’t need time to build the chemistry. We just have to pretend it was us three, or four years ago. And it will over faster than you thought it would.”

Seungcheol clenches his fist on his side. “You’re still as cruel as that time.”

“We’ll see each other again in three days,” Doyoon concludes. “Good afternoon, Seungcheol.”

Seungcheol releases his fist as he watches Doyoon’s back getting farther. “Good afternoon, Doyoon.”

 

 

*****

 

 

“He said that? ‘We just have to pretend it was us three or four years ago’? He seriously said something like that?”

Mingyu and Seungcheol are sitting on the couch in their dorm’s living room in a lazy evening after they finished with afternoon practice. They need to reserve some energy for the shooting, so Seungcheol sets up a rule that late night practices are forbidden. Seungcheol accidentally tells Mingyu about what Doyoon has said to him today, and now the drummer is making various comical expressions of shock.

“Yes, Mingyu, you don’t have to repeat it again.”

“I didn’t know it was that bad for you and him,” Mingyu says after a long sigh. “I mean, of course we knew, but we also didn’t know it was _thaaat_ bad. It’s hard to believe, seeing how smitten you were with each other. I bet Soonyoung you guys were going to get married soon, I lost one hundred thousand won for that.”

Seungcheol glares at the tall drummer. “You and Soonyoung made a bet on my love life? You wanna die?”

“It was Soonyoung’s idea!” Mingyu cries, running away before Seungcheol has the time to throw anything at him. “He was envious at how lovely you and Doyoon-hyung looked back then. It was meant to be a joke, hyung, I swear!”

“It was my idea but Mingyu agreed to it,” Soonyoung joins them at the living room and throws a cushion aiming for Mingyu’s face. It lands perfectly on target. “It’s Soonyoung- _hyung_ for you, bastard!”

“You don’t have the cut to be called hyung, why should I bother?”

“How dare you, little bitch. I’m going to break your drum sticks before I break your own stick down there, so you’ll lose your dignity to even call yourself a man.”

“HEY! Don’t touch any of my sticks!”

Seungcheol laughs, forgetting why he was upset at Mingyu almost instantly. Spending time with his members is the universal remedy for him—their time together isn’t always a good one, but there’s always something good when they are together no matter how tough the situation is.

Someone offers Seungcheol a bowl of popcorn, Seungcheol whips around to see Minghao standing behind him, grinning. “Snack?” he asks. Seungcheol accepts the bowl with a nod.

“Sure, thanks.”

“Junghan-hyung called and said we’re going to do the first shoot in three days, hyung,” he says. “Seungcheol-hyung, did the meeting not go well?”

Seungcheol’s hand freezes on air. He slowly puts his hand down and asks, “It went well, except for some part... that wasn’t included at the meeting. Why?”

Minghao shrugs. “That was what Junghan-hyung asked me on the phone. I said I didn’t know because you didn’t tell us anything, and he just wished us luck for the shooting. That’s all.”

“Maybe Doyoon-hyung told him something,” Soonyoung says. “Honestly, it’s surprising enough that Doyoon-hyung still accepts the contract. I mean, there’s no way he doesn’t know you’re in this band, since he was already with you when we started from the scratch. But of course, that won’t be easy for you to stay cool like nothing’s happened when you’re only five inches away from your ex.”

“Or maybe the concept is too much?” Mingyu adds. “Two young men reunite after a long time separation, and they’re still so in love even though life was rough for them and they choose to stay for whatever circumstance as long as they’re together. And the ones playing the scene are you and Doyoon-hyung. It’s super hard even for me, even though I don’t have an ex in this industry.”

Soonyoung sighs loudly, “So that was why Chan was frantically apologizing when the schedule came. Why didn’t he tell us earlier?”

“It wasn’t his fault,” Seungcheol cuts in. “He didn’t know it would be Doyoon, either. No one knows before the management unfolds it themselves. The higher-ups didn’t know Doyoon and I were lovers back then, so it couldn’t be helped. Doyoon’s career is on its peak right now and it will benefit us as well.”

Soonyoung shifts to snuggle on Seungcheol’s body, hugging tight one of his arms. “You’re Choi Seungcheol, Spear Kings’ beast. You’re the strongest, and I’m sure you can go through all of this. You are the bravest and strongest person I’ve ever met, hyung.”

Mingyu crawls on the floor and fits his lanky body between Seungcheol’s legs, hugging his knees to his chest so he has enough space to sit between the couch and the coffee table. He looks up at Seungcheol, grinning. “True, it’s just a piece of cake. You can even practice with one of us if it’s necessary. We know you can do this, hyung, not only about work, but also about you and your feelings. You can do this.”

Minghao is the last to join the troop, hugging Seungcheol’s free arm after putting the popcorn bowl somewhere else. “We’ve got your back, Leader-nim. You’re not alone, and we’re always here to support you physically and emotionally. You can do this, hyung. Do you want us to wear our cheerleader costumes on the scene?”

“No thanks, and fuck you,” Soonyoung and Mingyu answer simultaneously, glaring at Minghao. Seungcheol laughs, loud, his heart warm just like his body with the kids cuddled around him.

“Thanks, guys. I’ll be okay. Come on, get some rest. We’ll have a busy day tomorrow.”

 

 

 

Junghan sent him a text later that night. It was Doyoon’s phone number.

_Not sure if you’ve already had it saved, but just in case._

Doyoon never changed his phone number, Seungcheol still has it memorized it perfectly inside his head and it’s scary how two years can’t even erase a single memory about Doyoon. Seungcheol clicks the number to save it, and his phone says the number is already saved under the name 애인. Seungcheol sighs and runs a hand through his hair, frustrated.

After two years, after the constant hurt he’s suppressing deep inside his heart for two fucking years, he still finds it difficult to even change Doyoon’s contact name on his phone, not even to his name—as if Seungcheol doesn’t want to emphasize that they have no connection whatsoever now. Seungcheol quickly types a reply to Junghan—just a simple _Thanks, I might need it later_ —and throws his phone to his bed, gets up and leaves to the bathroom.

Junghan’s reply comes a little later while Seungcheol is still in the bathroom.

_I forgot to mention, tomorrow the director will brief you about the script. I’ll tag the location here, meet Doyoon there at 10. DO NOT RUIN THE MOOD we’ll need you to cooperate until the shooting is done, at least. I’LL BE WATCHING U._

 

 

*****

 

 

Seungcheol arrives at the arranged place fifteen minutes later than promised time. Doyoon is already sitting there with someone; a man, probably the director. Doyoon sees him first and waves his hand, gesturing Seungcheol to come closer.

“Sorry I’m late, the traffic was bad.” Seungcheol bows at the director and cocks his head a little at Doyoon. “Have you waited long?”

“Not really, we’re barely talking about anything here,” the director smiles. “Allow me to introduce myself properly this time. I’m Choi Minki, the director in charge for this video. Spear Kings’ head manager had personally contacted me to ask me this favor, and I’m more than willing to do it. Working with the kings is always fun, and now the fun doubled with Doyoon as our lead actor. You two have known each other, right?”

Doyoon and Seungcheol nod awkwardly. “We’re old acquaintances,” Seungcheol offers, clearing his throat to make it less weird.

“Okay, then we can go straight to the point,” Director Choi claps his hand. “Yesterday I gave you the overall concept for this video, right? You two will play as a couple, separated by circumstance for a long time and you’ve been living your life hard and rough, but one day you reunite and realize both of you still love each other and decide to stay together to face the world. The highlight is how trust and faith you put on each other can overcome the obstacles lie ahead of you.”

Seungcheol and Doyoon exchange a quick glance, too quick for Director Choi to notice, but that’s perhaps because the director is so absorbed in his story-telling session. This concept is really good, but it mocks Doyoon and Seungcheol in a way it stings before they even started anything.

“Those are the most important thing on a relationship—we’re not only talking about same sex relationships, but relationships in general. The gay representative is just to show audience how being _slightly_ different can’t cast you out of being in love. Ah, that is what I say to the reporters, but in reality I just really like looking at two boys in love.”

Director Choi talks more about the concept, lecturing Seungcheol about acting lessons since Seungcheol is considered amateur compared to Doyoon, and a whole lot more about the tips to pull out chemistry between them.

“I’m sure this video will come out great,” Director Choi says, his eyes twinkling with hope. “I bet both of you will look great together. There’s something about you that I can’t tell but I can feel it.”

“Thank you, Director Choi. We’ll try not to disappoint you,” Doyoon says sweetly. “We’ll be filming the first scene in two days, right?”

“That’s right,” Director Choi nods vigorously. “I’ve talked with my staffs and they’d agreed that we start with the group shooting first. The scene where the hard tools take place, I mean. Doyoon will come in the transition but overall, we’ll focus on Spear Kings. So Seungcheol, prepare your boys well.”

“I will,” Seungcheol nods.

“Okay then, I’ll be going first since I still have a lot of things to do,” Director Choi gets up from his seat and gestures to the other two to remain sitting. “No, you don’t have to show me off. You two, take your time. Take this as an actors’ bonding time from me, so you’ll surprise me on the scene tomorrow. See you guys!”

It doesn’t take long until there are only Seungcheol and Doyoon again in one place, enveloped with awkwardness and none of them bothers to break the silence first. Doyoon sips on his tea, slowly, like he’s waiting for Seungcheol to talk. Seungcheol fidgets on his seat, unsure what to do and what to say, but he _can’t_ just leave like an idiot.

“They tend to leave us alone like this every time they got a chance, huh?”

Doyoon puts down his cup and smiles at the statement-like question. “I guess so,” he answers. “Maybe they thought we were awkward strangers who happened to work together in a project and they tried to get us closer. If only they knew.”

Seungcheol sighs, “There are so many things I wanted to ask you, but I know this is not the right time.”

“I’m listening.”

“Why did you accept this project? You knew something like this was very likely to happen if we meet again.”

“I knew you’re going to ask that,” says Doyoon. “My company owes Director Choi a favor after his last project with us, which was a huge success. Then, your band’s head manager called him to take care of your new music video, and he asked me to be the lead actor. He informed your company and they didn’t seem to mind, so here I am. I was not in place to reject the offer since the director asked me himself, and personal feeling was forbidden at work.”

Seungcheol sighs, now everything does make sense. Almost everyone on his band (including the staffs) knew about him and Doyoon, that’s why Chan panicked when the news came out. No one would expect Seungcheol to work with his ex—not in a music video where they have to act like lovers—and if Seungcheol had known he’d have refused it completely.

(Or maybe, no, for some reasons Seungcheol isn’t sure himself.)

“I see,” Seungcheol finally says after a pause. “Can I ask you something else?”

Doyoon tilts his head, unwary. “Sure.”

Seungcheol stares at Doyoon intensely but his words come out soft, more like he’s hesitant to say it. “Why did you leave me two years ago?”

Freeze. Everything freezes. Doyoon can only hear the sound of the clock and his own rapid heartbeat.

“Why did you leave without telling me anything?” Seungcheol repeats his question, demanding an answer.

“I left because you didn’t give me any more reason to stay,” Doyoon says, eyes cold but his voice trembling. “And I have tried to tell you, many times, but you didn’t listen to me. You didn’t even realize you did not pay attention to what I said. And I’ve got enough, Seungcheol. I’ve got enough.”

Seungcheol can feel his blood boiling under his skin. “I didn’t give you enough reason to stay, you say? Then what would you call those five years I spent for you and _you_ only? I fought so hard for us, Doyoon. You saw how rough it was for us back then! And you said I did not give you any reason to stay? What kind of reason were you expecting from me?!”

“Was that fight really for me, for us, or was it for you because you hated being lonely?”

Doyoon’s words stab Seungcheol right on his chest like an arrow, and his heart stops for a second.

“What?”

“Your road was rough and rocky, Seungcheol, I knew that since I walked beside you from the start. But when you were finally a step ahead of me, did you wait for me? Or did you walk further without looking back, thinking that I’d always follow you behind? Well, I did for almost three years, but then what? Do you remember when was the last time you told me you love me, at least, when we were still dating?”

Seungcheol doesn’t answer. He doesn’t remember. And he just realizes how much that hurt Doyoon, but he kept silent because at that time Seungcheol was just starting his career with Spear Kings.

“Where were you when my family was falling apart?”

Seungcheol’s head jerks up. This piece of information is _very_ new to him.

“So you don’t remember. No, you don’t even know about it,” Doyoon nods thoughtfully. “Not your fault. Our relationship was already sour at the moment, anyway. I’m sorry, Seungcheol, I didn’t mean to corner you like this. And I’m sorry if my answers didn’t satisfy you.” Doyoon gets up from his seat. Seungcheol catches his hand right before he leaves, but Doyoon gently moves his hand away.

“I need to go and cool my head. You probably need that, too. We’ll talk again later. I’ll call.”

Seungcheol removes his hand, hesitating but he doesn’t really have any choice. It’s just – he feels weird, he feels like he lets Doyoon run away from him for the second time and Seungcheol doesn’t want that to happen. But he knows Doyoon is right, both of them aren’t on their right minds now.

“Okay.”

They part away just like that. It’s silent again, the air is unbearably suffocating, and Seungcheol can’t help but rewinding the time of when they broke up two years ago.

And how it hurt him so bad, but he never knew how much it damaged Doyoon—he never tried to know.

 

 

*****

 

 

It’s almost midnight when Seungcheol rings the bell at Jisoo’s place, and he isn’t even surprised to see Junghan open the door for him. Seungcheol is 100% sure Junghan has started piling his belongings here before officially move in some time later.

“Uh, good evening, even though you’re not even the owner of this place.”

Junghan shoots him a dirty look with arms crossed in front of his chest. “What are you doing here? It’s neither your dorm nor your own place, Seungcheol. And you’re not going to discuss anything about work with Jisoo at this time. He’s exhausted.”

“I know, Mr. Jisoo’s Loyal Guardian, I’m here to see you. I knew you’d be at his place so I came here straight from the dorm after making sure I tucked my kids to bed. Are you happy, now?”

Junghan’s face softens. “Are you here to talk about Doyoon?”

Seungcheol shrugs, “Kinda.”

Junghan steps aside to make way on the entrance. “Fine, come in.”

 

 

 

They are sitting on the couch on the living room in awkward silent. Junghan understands why Seungcheol can’t just blabber about what’s been bothering his mind, so he leaves him and reads a book beside him instead. Junghan makes sure he’ll listen whenever Seungcheol is ready to speak.

“Hey, Junghan.” Seungcheol calls after what feels like eternity.

“Hmm?”

“Was Doyoon’s family ever falling apart about two years ago?”

Junghan looks up from the book he’s reading, nose scrunched until his round specs are threating to fall off from the bridge of his nose. “Is that a question I am supposed to answer?”

Seungcheol rolls his eyes. “Of course, I asked you a question. Now answer.”

Junghan closes his book and puts it down dramatically loud on the coffee table, earning a yell from Jisoo, the apartment’s rightful owner from the kitchen. Junghan shouts an apology to his boyfriend but Seungcheol knows he doesn’t feel sorry at all.

“Gosh, it takes you two freaking years to finally ask about that,” Junghan clicks his tongue in disbelief. “When Doyoon came to me all heartbroken, I thought he had told you about this and it was the reason why he wanted to... well, to end everything. But you seemed like you had no idea and it surprised me that you _actually_ had no idea. Really, what were you doing during the past couple of years after you broke up with Doyoon?”

“Trying to get over him with no avail, I guess,” Seungcheol says weakly. “I didn’t know the reason he left me and I was so heartbroken as well, but I had Spear Kings and I had to keep on going. I didn’t even know if I’ve made a mistake before we broke up, Doyoon didn’t tell me anything afterward.”

“And you didn’t ask?” guesses Junghan correctly.

Seungcheol nods. “Yeah, I’ve always partly blamed him for leaving me so suddenly. And earlier after Director Choi left, he told me he left because I didn’t give him any more reason to stay. That I left him behind, and he was tired catching up to me. That he tried to tell me but I wasn’t listening. That I wasn’t there... when his family was falling apart...” Seungcheol pauses to take a deep breath. “I’d known there was something wrong with our relationship before Doyoon decided to end it that way. But I didn’t know—I thought I was the only one hurting.”

Junghan rolls his eyes like he wants them to roll to another dimension. “You were stupid and you still are, now. How could you think you were the only one hurting, you fool? Doyoon was living like a zombie for weeks before he could finally function as a human again, after seeing you live well with Spear Kings and all. He thought you’d moved on, and so he had to. Honestly, Seungcheol. Have you ever seen Doyoon sad? Have you ever realized when he was feeling unwell, or tired, or just wanted a company?”

“No,” Seungcheol says after a while. “I don’t think I’ve done things I should do when I was with him. And Doyoon isn’t the type who would tell me what’s wrong, and he would keep them himself.”

“That’s yet another problem,” Junghan agrees, sighing. “And about Doyoon’s family, you should ask him yourself. All I can say is yes, he was having a hard time with his family at that time. He was confused, tired, and obviously lonely. He didn’t tell me the exact reason of why he broke up with you though, but I think he just wanted to make it personal so I didn’t ask.”

Seungcheol’s fingers twiddle on the hem of his sweater. “Do you think it’s possible for me and Doyoon to do this project together? Too many personal feelings got involved no matter how professional I and Doyoon try to be. I mean, this is not easy _at all_. You can’t just forget you were lovers instantly when you face each other every so often, and you have to act lovey-dovey and such.”

“I know it’s hard, but think of it as a way to move on, like, a huge leap to move on for both of you. If you still have feelings for each other, talk it out. See if it’s going to work for the second time, or end it all the way at once. Treat the concept like a nostalgic moment of when you and Doyoon were still in love. Don’t let your heart get in the way; you’re an entertainer after all. Entertainers don’t fall in love with their project partner—unless you still want him outside the project,” Junghan ends his long speech with a wink. Seungcheol snorts a laugh, feeling less stressed than when he arrived here.

“Thank you, Junghan. You’re such a pro.”

“Oh, boy, you don’t know how many hardships I’ve gone through to get into Jisoo’s heart, including breaking my own heart several times to finally get him patch it up for me.”

Seungcheol laughs, “To that extent?”

Junghan nods smugly. “To that extent.”

“Please stop spurting up bullshit on my holy place,” Jisoo says, throwing his apron to Junghan’s face and one of his baking gloves to Seungcheol’s, and takes a seat beside Junghan on the couch. “I was about to praise you for your speech for Seungcheol when you suddenly brought up a topic about us, so I took it back. Please, baby, can you stop linking us to other people’s problems? They don’t need to hear about it. Our story isn’t even worth telling.”

“Who says? It’s my favorite story and I will let the world know about how getting into your heart is as hard as conquering the world. But it’s okay, because you’re my world. It’s worth all the effort.”

“Gross,” Seungcheol grimaces, but he’s still laughing with them. “Thanks a lot, Junghan. I feel so much better now.”

“I don’t know why but I feel weird hearing that from you,” Jisoo says jokingly. “Let me rephrase that. I feel weird hearing you feel so much better after Junghan comforted you. It could be taken at the wrong context, but _not_ that I’m talking about the wrong context.”

“He’s jealous,” Junghan laughs. “Gosh, Jisoo is so cute and I really want to kiss him now, so you better go, Seungcheol. I don’t want any spectator when I do things to my boyfriend.”

“You’re a beast,” Seungcheol mumbles. Still, he leaves, because it’s already past midnight and only God knows what will happen later to the two men in love; Seungcheol doesn’t want to traumatize himself with inappropriate and unwanted experience.

“We’ll see each other again tomorrow at the scene. Don’t be late!” Junghan reminds him. Seungcheol gestures an OK with his fingers without looking back and slams the front door shut. He glances at his watch, feeling glad that he still has some time to walk around before heading back to the dorm. Jisoo’s apartment is located in the heart of Seoul, just right at the corner that never sleeps. Seungcheol shoves his hands to his coat pockets and hums an unnamed melody, considering which coffee shop or café will be his next destination.

His steps slowed down at the same time with the person across him, and they both look up at the same time. Seungcheol’s eyes widen completely, “Doyoon?”

The other person—turned out to be Doyoon, what a small world they’re living—smiles awkwardly, nodding. “Hi. What a nice coincidence, seeing you here at this hour. What are you doing here?”

“I was meeting a friend,” Seungcheol shrugs at the direction where he came from. “What about you? What are you doing here?”

“My hotel is around here and I can’t sleep, so I decide to go for a walk. And I was thinking to get some coffee.”

“Strangely enough, I was thinking the same,” Seungcheol smiles, “wanna grab coffee together?”

 

 

*****

 

 

What’s funnier than two people, ex-boyfriends, meeting past midnight at the small coffee shop in Gangnam, staring silently at their cup of coffee? True, Seungcheol was offering the idea. He did that on reflex because he wanted to avoid looking like a fool in front of Doyoon. But he doesn’t expect things to _still_ be awkward when there are only the two of them. More so, they were fighting just a couple hours ago.

But maybe, it’s Seungcheol’s chance to fix the situation.

“I’m sorry,” Seungcheol starts, pretending to be so focused on stirring his coffee but silently observing Doyoon’s reaction from across the table. Doyoon looks up, face expectant.

“For what?”

“For what happened this afternoon. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable and, I don’t know, upset? I was a fool, Junghan said I still am now, and I know it’s true. That’s why I’m sorry, for everything.”

Doyoon smiles weakly at him. “I’m sorry, too. I shouldn’t be saying things that would ruin our professionalism when we have to work together in sync.”

“Maybe we need to forget it for a while, about us in the past, I mean. They didn’t know we had a thing going on for five years and they don’t need to know anything about it now.”

“I agree,” Doyoon says. “I need to make a living so I have to do this job properly.”

“Me too, I have three kids and a rent I should pay every month.”

They laugh, for the first time feeling so relaxed around each other after multiple jittery (and not in a good way) moments. This almost feels like they’re friends again, like how they started it before they were dating.

“Do you guys still live at the old place?”

“No, we’ve moved for about three months now. Closer to the studio, don’t have to catch the bus in the morning anymore, Mingyu is the happiest about this since he’s the slowest to wake up in the morning. I’ll give you the new address, and you should come to our dorm when you have time. The kids miss you. I know you are still in touch with them but it’s better to come in person, isn’t it?”

Doyoon looks surprised and glad at the same time. “Is that okay? I don’t want to disturb your practice.”

“That’s okay, all of our staffs know you anyway. Just point out a time and they will clear out the schedule for you,” Seungcheol chuckles. Doyoon laughs.

“I’ll think about that,” he says, almost sounds like a promise. “I can promise you that much,” he adds later.

“A promise, good,” Seungcheol agrees. “Hey, Doyoon?”

“Yes?”

“Let’s go, I’ll take you back.”

 

 

*****

 

 

The shooting starts early the next morning. Seungcheol can feel the tension and excitement floating around the air he breathes, and it feels nice. So many people are anticipating another masterpiece to be born from Director Choi’s golden hands, and with Doyoon as the lead actor, it excites people even more.

Seungcheol walks away from the crowd, choosing a place shadowed by the shooting equipment to take a breath. Suddenly something cold is pressed against his cheek, he whips around to see Doyoon holding a bottle of cold energy drink for him.

“Finished already?” the actor asks, offering the bottle.

“Yeah, they’re taking individual shoots for Spear Kings now.” Seungcheol accepts the bottle, mumbling a _thanks_ under his breath. “Director Choi seems happy with what we got today. He might call it a day faster than planned, but he wants us to stay to talk about storyline shooting tomorrow.”

“I’m pretty much free, so it’s fine,” Doyoon says. “Anyway, you looked amazing today. Two years really doesn’t change someone’s powerful stage presence even for the music video, does it?”

Seungcheol gulps. Ah, he forgets this is Doyoon. This Doyoon gives people compliments nonchalantly, always unaware at how his words can affect people. Especially people who take those sayings seriously, people like Seungcheol. Especially Seungcheol.

“Thanks, you look great too.”

“Of course he does! _I_ was choosing the wardrobe for him personally. Director Choi wants me to make sure you two are the living version of _match made in heaven_.” Junghan pops out of nowhere, giving Doyoon a playful hug and Seungcheol a side glare. “I’m so happy to work with you again, Doyoonie! It’s always fun experimenting my ideas with you, not like a certain someone over there who always grumbles and protests when I try to make him look like a Greek god.”

“You make me look like a clown and not anywhere close to a god, dumbass.” Seungcheol says. Doyoon laughs, patting Junghan on the back.

“Thank you, I owe you this one,” he says. “I have to go. I’ll catch you guys again later!”

Seungcheol and Junghan watch Doyoon approaching Spear Kings troop, the boys have finished their parts and they look beyond happy to meet and chat with Doyoon again. Director Choi and his staffs need to pull Doyoon away from that place because Mingyu and Soonyoung won’t shut up and the shooting will take forever if they don’t use a little bit of violence.

“Your boys look so happy,” Junghan notices that, too. “No wonder, Doyoon was close with them even before Spear Kings came to life.”

“He was like their mother,” Seungcheol adds. “The most caring, the most understanding, the gentlest, the one who would always fill our fridge with homemade foods regularly when we were running out of money. The kids often took out the complaints for me to him, maybe they felt like they found some source of comfort within him.”

Junghan glances at Seungcheol. “If Doyoon was the caring mother, what were you?”

“A strict father,” Seungcheol chuckles softly. “Practice and everything were hell when we first started the business. I was stressed out most of the time, and Doyoon would calm me down every time because the kids were afraid to do so.”

“He was playing big part for Spear Kings,” Junghan nods. “Too bad you guys broke up. But no one can understand how things are going inside that little head of Doyoon, so we can’t really blame him either. He must’ve had a reason for what he had done.”

“Now, do you understand when I told you too many personal feelings got involved in this project? Doyoon and I were more than just _ex_. It was only a small part of circumstance that came between us, and we had a whole universe beyond it.”

“You still have feelings for him?” Junghan asks carefully.

Seungcheol stretches his arms out, yawning. “Who knows? It’s not easy to get rid of feelings that have been stayed for more than five years. That, and every time I look at Doyoon I remember about how we first started Spear Kings and how it has grown up to be like this now. It’s no easy feeling, I must say. I can’t let myself get emotional every time I meet him face to face.”

Junghan tilts his head. “Why?”

“Doyoon was the inspiration of our debut song,” Seungcheol says, the corner of his lips tugged into a small smile but Junghan can see sadness on his eyes. “He was part of the reasons why we exist and the reason why we tried to survive when things went downhill. Sadly it didn’t work in our relationship.”

“Clear things out with him after tomorrow shoot,” Junghan suggests. “Seungcheol, a relationship is about two hearts moving together in sync. You can’t be too fast or too slow, you need to walk side-to-side. And that’s what I failed to see in you and Doyoon, even though I know how much you loved each other.”

Seungcheol gives Junghan a skeptical look. “Wow, even someone like you know about these things?”

“I just quoted what Jisoo said to me the other day,” Junghan waves at Seungcheol in dismiss. “Jisoo is your head manager and he’s a keen observer. The thing is he doesn’t like to talk about other’s problems, but he always has them pent up inside. Guess who’s a good boyfriend to be his ear and hear all his wisdom words about relationship? Me.”

Seungcheol punches Junghan’s arm playfully. “Stop bragging, man. It doesn’t make you look better at all.”

“Stop being salty at people who are happy with their relationship,” Junghan shoots back, laughing. “I’m your friend, Seungcheol, and I happen to be Doyoon’s close friend as well. I and Jisoo wish you both all the best, either with each other or with someone else... though personally we’d prefer the first option.”

“Before we get too far in the topic, if you failed to remember, your boyfriend was furious when he first found out I was dating Doyoon. If he were given a knife, pretty sure he would’ve stabbed me to death back then. That was the scariest moment of Jisoo for the entire time I’ve known him.”

“He did that because he was concerned of your career, dumbass. He was never against you dating a man. He was afraid that your careless decision would hurt you and the other kids too, when you’ve been working so hard to get into the business. Jisoo himself was having it hard when he came out and he didn’t want you to go through the same thing—at least not that time when you just started your way to achieve your dream. Gosh, my boyfriend was very thoughtful but you caught him wrong and you acted like you were enemies for months. I hate you.”

Seungcheol smiles; a little bit embarrassed at that, to be honest. Junghan returns his with a gentle, genuine smile. “Thank you, Junghan. Really, thank you. Tell Jisoo I said thanks too, and I’m sorry for being an immature brat most of the time under his watch.”

“My boyfriend is nice so he would’ve already forgiven you long time ago, also don’t thank me now. Do it after I hear the good news,” Junghan winks and gives Seungcheol a pat on the back. “Go. The director is looking for you.”

Seungcheol passes by Doyoon when he walks up to Director Choi. Doyoon flashes him a small smile and Seungcheol doesn’t have any choice other than smiles back at him. God, the butterflies are _still_ there. Damn those fucking stupid butterflies.

Maybe two years of what Seungcheol though was despair isn’t enough to erase all things related to Doyoon, and maybe—or no, not maybe, it is the fact—those feelings he thought he had buried deep still linger in a secret corner of his heart, longing to see the light.

 _Moved on my ass_ , Seungcheol curses under his breath. No one hears that, fortunately.

 

 

*****

 

 

They have prepared a room for the next filming session, where the lovey-dovey part takes place. Seungcheol can’t hide his surprise to see the neatly arranged set—a king size bed covered in white sheet, a guitar lying on the wooden table, two mugs and two plates, and another stuffs indicating there are two people living here.

“You can take a look around, use whatever you have here as your property for the scene. We’ll depend a lot on improvisations, so don’t expect too much guidance from me. We need to make this scene as natural as possible.” Director Choi commands from his mini-speaker. “Choi Seungcheol, your every expression matters here. Show the world that you’re in love. Carry the message of your love song here. You can do well behind the screen with the lyrics and all, you can do just as well on screen. I don’t have many things to say to Doyoon since he knows the job. Everyone, are you clear?”

_“Yes, Sir!”_

“Yes, Sir,” Seungcheol answers almost reluctantly. Does Director Choi need to make it _that_ loud?

Seungcheol turns to his side when Doyoon chuckles beside him. “Director Choi looks very energetic today, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, I wonder if he ever loses his gas.”

“Let’s work well together,” Doyoon offers him a hand. “Come to think of it, this would be our very first collaboration, speaking professionally. We weren’t brave enough to do that years ago and it’s exciting, to be honest.”

“Sure,” Seungcheol accepts the hand, shaking it lightly. “Please take care of me. I don’t think I fit this job.”

“You’ll see how fun this is when you try,” Doyoon says. “I’ll see you again after we change our clothes.”

“Yeah, see you.”

 

 

 

The first scene is a “romantic bed scene”, that’s how Director Choi refers to it. Seungcheol is dressed in his pajamas, and now Director Choi is checking he acts yawning. For Seungcheol, this is ridiculous.

“This is embarrassing.” Seungcheol protests, “I could yawn just _fine_ , what are you making me do it several times for?”

“I told you your every expression matters here,” Director Choi says. “This is easy, but you need to do it naturally so it won’t look weird because well, I told you this is a bed scene. You and Doyoon need to act like you’ve slept together numerous of time, were both sober when doing it, and very much in love. Understand?”

“I understand, okay.” Seungcheol wants to sigh because hell, he and Doyoon _did_ sleep together numerous of time, and now is exactly not the time for him to remember how it felt back then, and how he has to reluctantly admit he misses those times. “Anyway, where’s Doyoon?”

“He should be here in a moment,” says Director Choi. “Oh, there he comes.”

Seungcheol turns his head for a quick check—he swears, it’s a common sense, isn’t it?—but the quick check isn’t quick at all with how Seungcheol can’t take his eyes off Doyoon the second his gaze landed on him. Doyoon looks... unreal, he looks angelic. Is that possible for someone who only wears loose white shirt and black shorts? And who the hell made him wear those shorts?

“It doesn’t feel like I’m filming,” Doyoon says to the staffs, laughing. “This is literally me when I got home and on my way to out on the bed.”

“The vibe of domesticity is the key,” Director Choi approaches Doyoon to admire on his look from up close. “The main point of this scene is you found your home on Seungcheol and vice versa, so you don’t want to give that up to society’s absurd standard. Because who cares about what people say when you have someone you love, loves you back, in a warm house like this?”

Doyoon’s expression changes and before Seungcheol gets to ask him why, Director Choi already sends his people away, leaving Doyoon and Seungcheol on the set.

“Surprise me,” Director Choi says before gives the action cue to the director.

Seungcheol and Doyoon nod. With the count of three, the light is up and the camera starts rolling.

“Trust me,” Doyoon says, pushing Seungcheol lightly on the bed and crawls on top of him, eyes sparkling and Seungcheol thinks he could be blind if Doyoon stares at him like that longer. “We’ll make it look like I’m trying to get you back to the bed when you’re already up.”

“Sounds easy,” Seungcheol replies, playing along. He yawns—the best one he could manage to do just to impress Director Choi, _this business is insane_ —and circles his arms around Doyoon’s waist to roll him over. Doyoon laughs when his head hits the pillow, his arms hugging Seungcheol’s neck as he tries to flip the position. Seungcheol lets him win though, and then he pulls the sheet when Doyoon looks away and hides his face under it. Doyoon hits him, slightly annoyed, but Seungcheol stays still. Doyoon finally gets to use his trump card—tickling Seungcheol’s waist, the most ticklish spot out of his giant body. Seungcheol yelps, laughing, he catches Doyoon’s hand to pull him in and Doyoon’s face ends up bumping his chest, and when Doyoon looks up their faces are only one breath away.

This is weird, Seungcheol thinks. Until before the camera rolls, Seungcheol is almost one hundred percent sure he can’t do this, being so close and so intimate with someone who left him a bleeding scar from two years ago. But when Doyoon touches him, Seungcheol decides to just let it flow because it feels so damn familiar and Seungcheol misses this. He misses Doyoon, he misses how Doyoon used to make him feel, and even though Seungcheol is well aware those feelings are not supposed to stay there, Seungcheol lets his heart win this time.

Director Choi cuts the scene before Seungcheol actually thinks of leaning down and kissing Doyoon—which is very, very dangerous. Doyoon climbs off his body awkwardly and busies himself with one of Junghan’s staff on the corner of the room, not looking at Seungcheol but Seungcheol catches a glimpse of his face getting so red like a boiled lobster. He chuckles softly.

“What are you laughing about?” Junghan asks, suddenly standing beside him. The fashion director starts observing Seungcheol from head to toe to make sure he looks decent enough to go for another scene, but he definitely doesn’t miss giving Seungcheol a suspicious, demanding look.

“Why do you want to know?” Seungcheol shoots back.

“Because it seems like you’re laughing because of whatever has happened between you and Doyoon on the scene and I need to know.”

“That is such a weird reason,” Seungcheol laughs. “But it’s nothing, really. It’s just—I thought working on this isn’t as difficult as I thought it would be. I don’t know about him, though,” Seungcheol shrugs at Doyoon’s direction without actually looking. Junghan peeks over Seungcheol’s shoulder and grins.

“I’m sure Doyoon also feels the same,” he says, lifting a hand to fix Seungcheol’s hair. “If he doesn’t, he won’t look at me like he wants to make me disappear in front of you in an instant.”

Seungcheol frowns, “And why is that?”

“I don’t know, you know him better than anyone else here, Seungcheol. Does Doyoon like sharing?”

“Well, no, he isn’t very fond of sharing what are claimed as his. But how is that related to this situation now?”

“You’ll see soon enough when one of you has finally decided to stop being dumb,” Junghan gives him a wink and turns around, back facing Seungcheol. He whips his head just a second later, though. “Oh, before I forgot. You and Doyoon looked great just now, by the way. Director Choi kept squealing happily. He said he could smell success and fame from the way you pulled the chemistry out, and he could not wait for the video to be released to public.”

Seungcheol rolls his eyes. “He’s exaggerating.”

“He’d always had eyes for the best,” Junghan corrects him. “Let’s eat after we’re done with this. The four of us, because I know you’re going to opt out if it’s only me and Jisoo.”

Seungcheol groans. Four means Doyoon will be with them, and Seungcheol isn’t ready for that... yet. Not when Junghan and Jisoo are his opponents—which is a very unfavorable situation he’s ever been in. He _does_ plan to take Doyoon somewhere to eat, though, but only the two of them so the situation won’t be as awkward as when Junghan and Jisoo are around as well. “All you do is making me suffer, Yoon Junghan. How could you call yourself my friend?”

“I am never your friend. I’m being friendly with you because my boyfriend is taking care of you and your group, and because you’re hopeless and dumb and sometimes there should be someone angelic enough to kick your ass so you can see the world better.”

Seungcheol deadpans, “ _Asshole_.”

“You’re not any better than me,” Junghan smiles sweetly. “See you later, loser!”

 

 

*****

 

 

Junghan isn’t someone who likes keeping secret, but he prefers to save it for himself this time. He owes a whole lot of explanation for Doyoon and Seungcheol—and Jisoo has warned him several times about this, but Junghan insists something has to be done to get things right between Doyoon and Seungcheol.

To put it simply, Junghan was one of the reasons why Doyoon and Seungcheol got involved in this project, and probably the only one other than Jisoo who knew what was going on between them in the past.

“Junghan, baby, this is not right. Not in every way. You see how... well, how messy it is between Seungcheol and Doyoon after they broke up? They hadn’t even talked to each other for two years, how does dragging them into this project together solve the problem?”

“They didn’t talk not because they didn’t want to, Shua. They were just confused, and they still are until now. That’s why, I play cupid here to straight up the endless misunderstandings between them.”

Jisoo sighs, “How are you so sure?”

“Oh come on, I’ve known Doyoon for years now, and I can pretty much read this Seungcheol guy because he’s easy to read but stubborn as a brick. Also because they are our friends, and I’ve been waiting for a chance to have double date.”

Jisoo can’t help but laugh. “I’m sure that was your intention from the start.”

“Oh, we can deal with that later.” Junghan smiles in response. “Now, I need to lure Seungcheol out from his own created misery and talk to Doyoon like a goddamn human being. I know Doyoon and I can tell he’s still so much in love with Seungcheol, even though I’m not really sure why he wanted to break up. But the point is, Doyoon has to know about how Seungcheol feels from Seungcheol’s mouth either for good or worse, even though I’m confident it will be _good_. This project is, you can’t deny, the perfect opportunity for both of them to work it out.”

“I don’t understand the way you think, sometimes,” Jisoo sighs. “But fine, I can bring the suggestion to the people upstairs. Not really a bad idea, with the good reputation Doyoon has as an actor. The superiors will like this.”

“Throw one stone, kill two birds,” Junghan hums. “You don’t have to always understand the way I think, baby. You just need to be with me whatever I’m doing. And I know you’ll still love me either way, no?”

Jisoo scrunches his nose and tilts his head to kiss his boyfriend. “If something goes wrong with this, I have to take full responsibility and Seungcheol might never want to talk to me ever again, so _please_ , I beg you. Make sure it works.”

“I will take the responsibility, you don’t need to worry. But this plan _will_ work so both of us don’t have to clean up after anything, okay? Trust me. I always know what I’m doing.”

Long story short, Jisoo succeed in persuading their boss to get Doyoon to be the lead actor and Director Choi—who had always been an eager fan of Spear Kings but he didn’t tell anyone and always tried to keep it subtle—is trusted to lead the project. Junghan thought that maybe it was sort of fate that Doyoon’s company actually owed a favor to Director Choi, made it hard for Doyoon to refuse the offer. Well, even if it didn’t work that way, Junghan would just find a way.

“Chief Yoon, I don’t need just thank you is enough to express how thankful I am for your idea. Seungcheol and Doyoon is a match made in heaven, now I wonder why anyone didn’t think about this brilliant idea of pairing them together sooner. I felt like I’ve wasted my career not to see them together on screen, when they could be this... good. Magnificent. Excellent.”

Junghan laughs at Director Choi’s comment. “What I gave you was purely a suggestion, Director. I’m glad you liked my choice, but put that aside, the project wouldn’t be so great without your cold hands.”

Director Choi hums. “But still, I doubt anyone could deliver the love message in the concept that well if it weren’t them. Are you sure they are just old acquaintances? Even with a quick glance I can tell there’s something more about them, but of course you youngsters always have to make it all secret.”

Junghan scratches the back of his neck, suddenly feeling nervous. “Well, yeah, they are... friends.”

“I don’t know close friends can have that much of chemistry on screen, but that’s good. I’m really looking forward to work with them again, and I won’t be doing it alone. I will need your help in the future too, Chief Yoon.”

“I’ll try my best to help,” Junghan smiles and diverts his attention to the scene again, now with Seungcheol and Doyoon on the small dining table. Seungcheol is eating a cake and Doyoon is disturbing him from behind. Seungcheol pokes Doyoon’s cheek with his cream-coated finger and Doyoon squeals in surprise. They continue the childish fight until Doyoon ends up leaning his face too close to Seungcheol, and Director Choi shouts _“Cut!”_ right before Junghan thinks they might actually kiss at the moment.

“See what I mean? The sexual tension is real,” Director Choi laughs. “Okay, everyone, take a break! We’ll continue the last shoot after lunch!” Director Choi pats Junghan on the shoulder loudly. “Eat something, Chief Yoon. Pre-celebrating our success with this project, you know? I’ll treat you guys properly after the video is released.”

Junghan smiles at Director Choi. “I’d like that, Director. I’ll clean up some stuff first here, so I will catch up to you later. And can I pick the place to eat next time?”

“You’re quick to catch,” Director Choi says. “Yeah, sure, and don’t forget to bring that boyfriend of yours. What is his position again... isn’t he Spear Kings’ manager?”

“He is, and he’s a fan of your works,” Junghan amiably answers. “My boyfriend will love your invitation.”

“Okay, then. I’ll see you around after break?”

“Sure thing, Director.”

After Director Choi is out of sight, Junghan walks toward Seungcheol and gives him a loud pat on his back. Seungcheol yells as he turns back, and his face softens when he realizes it’s just Junghan. Doyoon is already gone—he left so fast, almost like a ninja—leaving only Seungcheol and Junghan on the scene.

“What do you want?” Seungcheol jokingly scowls.

“I want you and Doyoon to reconcile and put an end to this weird situation between you two when you’re not behind the camera,” Junghan rolls his eyes. “Seriously, Choi Seungcheol. No one will believe your story about how Doyoon broke your heart two years ago if you looked at him like _that_. Luckily everyone here thinks it’s because you and Doyoon have extremely good chemistry, not because you and him have a lot of unfinished business and you can’t still get over each other after you broke up.”

“How do I look at him?” Seungcheol asks. Junghan rolls his eyes again; Seungcheol is _so_ dumb sometimes.

“You look at him and your eyes scream love.”

 

 

*****

 

 

“You look at him and your eyes scream love.”

Seungcheol feels like he stops breathing for a second. “Excuse me, I didn’t ask you to be so dramatic suddenly. I was serious with my question.”

“Oh, and it was a serious answer,” Junghan says. “Your eyes cannot lie. I mean, sure, Doyoon broke off your relationship without telling you anything hurt, but your feelings for him stayed there. And you never realized that until you met him again. Am I right? Of course I am.”

Seungcheol has the sudden urge to strangle his friend but Junghan’s stating the truth. “Say you’re right. What should I do if I’m the only who feels this way? How if he can’t do anything about me still have a feeling for him, but he can’t love me back?”

“How if you stop questioning things and trying to find the answer instead?” Junghan strikes back. “Seungcheol, two years was long enough. Now, the situation is you and Doyoon are standing on two opposite sides of a cliff and you won’t be able to get back to him if you’re not closing the gap and talk to him properly. I’m telling you this because Doyoon isn’t going to do anything without a push. Even if... even if you’re not getting back together, at least clear the misunderstandings. It tortures me to see how Doyoon lives his life for the past two years, and I’m not planning to see him like that any longer.”

Seungcheol groans. “Why is that whatever you said about me and Doyoon always true?”

“Because I’m trying to play...” Junghan pauses, “...a best friend. For you and Doyoon. Yes, a best friend.”

Seungcheol frowns, “What was that pause for?”

“That was not something you should pay attention to,” Junghan hits Seungcheol on the back of his head. Seungcheol retaliates; hitting Junghan on the same place but the sweetness of revenge only lasts two seconds when someone hits him on that exact spot again, louder this time. And as expected, it’s Jisoo.

“You don’t go around and hit your company’s fashion director like that, Choi Seungcheol. You’ll either end up getting fired from your job or wearing rugs on stage, your choice.”

“So cold,” Seungcheol mumbles under his breath and shoots Junghan a glare. “Jisoo is different after he starts dating you. You’re a bad influence for people, Junghan.”

“At least my influence makes people dress better so they can appear as decent human being,” Junghan sticks out his tongue. “Go and eat something, we’re filming the last scene after break. Doyoon is eating by himself over there,” Junghan pushes Seungcheol’s face to the direction of a quiet corner where Doyoon is sitting. “No need to thank me now, as usual. And here’s your lunch box, lover boy.”

“I hate you,” Seungcheol affirms with annoyance as he accepts the box.

“Better that way. Only Jisoo is allowed to love me with all his heart, anyway, so don’t bother.”

Seungcheol cringes at the cheesy remark and strides away immediately before Junghan has another chance to speak cheap line to woo Jisoo. Seungcheol strolls to Doyoon’s direction, trying to be as subtle as possible—also, he hopes that Doyoon doesn’t hear Junghan shouts at him to “get him down tonight” because that sounds so wrong in front of your ex. Junghan’s brain is so screwed up.

“Hey,” he greets the actor. Doyoon looks up, smiling.

“Hey,” he replies. “Have you had lunch yet?”

Seungcheol lifts the unopened box. “Just going to have one, then I saw you here so I thought it wouldn’t hurt to eat here. Do you mind?”

Doyoon shakes his head. “Not really.”

“Okay, good.” And it’s awkward again. Seungcheol wonders how easy Doyoon acts so familiar with him in front of the camera when he’s this cold and distant without Director Choi and his staffs around. Now Seungcheol feels stupid for whatever nostalgia feelings he had during the shoots—Doyoon clearly doesn’t feel the same; not anymore. And Seungcheol is that one stupid guy everyone wants to kick in the ass if he were in a movie.

Doyoon is finished with his meal when he puts down his lunch box and says, “I’m really sorry about everything, Seungcheol.”

Seungcheol stops chewing his rice. “Um, what _everything_ are you talking about?”

“Everything,” repeats Doyoon. “About how I act when we first met again, about things I said to you before the shooting. And I’m sorry if I made you feel awkward and weird during the filming. I just tried to be professional and I didn’t want them to find out how I _actually_ felt about you when there were cameras and people around.”

Now, Seungcheol doesn’t think he can still eat in peace. “So, how do you actually feel about me without cameras and people around?” he asks, his tone demanding. He has the right to know the answer, at least, so he can do something about how he feels about Doyoon as well.

Doyoon looks at Seungcheol, and the leader of Spear Kings can see a hint of sadness in his eyes. “I feel... I don’t know. I’m not supposed to feel anything toward you anymore after we broke up, right? I know, and with the possibility of you hating me after what I’ve done two years ago, this feels... well, wrong. But at the same time, I feel like everything is back to the original place and I’ve been so lost for two years. It’s just me, and you don’t have to feel like it’s your fault or anything. It’s-”

“Doyoonie,” Seungcheol calls him, the first time he uses the nickname again after they—or specifically, Doyoon—cut off the string that was tied them together for over than five years. “Stop it. I won’t blame you for that, or even for what you’ve done two years ago. I was hurt, yes, but that doesn’t mean I hate you now. Though honestly, I tried. I tried so hard but I failed multiple times. So, I can relate to your situation completely. Whatever you think you’re feeling about me, you can take your time to think about that. And no one will put you on the blame, I promise.”

Doyoon blinks. “I thought you would hate me. You were so cold and your gesture looked like you didn’t want to be around me for five miles radius.”

Seungcheol lifts one corner of his mouth, chuckling half-heartedly. “Oh boy, I thought _you_ hated me. You even told me that we didn’t need much time to work with the chemistry and just pretend it was us three years ago before we broke up. I was totally hurt, you know. I thought that was just how much you didn’t want to give us a second chance.”

“I said that because I thought you didn’t want to see me for so long. Since well, you know, we haven’t talked for two whole years and I just didn’t know how to face you again. You were living so well, you must’ve had moved on.”

“I’m sorry to tell you this but I was living in hell the last two years, thank you very much. The only thing that made me survive was Spear Kings, and I thought it was _you_ who lived so well these past two years. You looked like you’ve forgotten everything when we first met again.”

“I thought—” Doyoon pauses for a second before bursting out laughing. “We should stop this now. There are too many misleading thoughts going on here.”

“I agree,” Seungcheol lets out a breathy laugh. “We have so much more to talk about. And I don’t know if Junghan had told you this, but he wanted the four of us to have a meal together after shooting is wrapped up. I don’t want to get trapped between the two lovers, though, so I’d really appreciate if you could come with us.”

“Yeah, Junghan mentioned something about us having dinner together,” Doyoon says. “You know, for a moment, I doubt Junghan is really dating your manager. I thought he was actually dating you, and you said that because you didn’t want to be exposed.”

Seungcheol frowns, “Is this another misunderstanding?”

Doyoon shrugs, “I guess so, unless you’re lying from the very start.”

Seungcheol sighs loudly, slightly annoyed but mostly relieved. He gets what Junghan was said before about Doyoon and sharing, which didn’t make any sense back then, but it does now. “I really hate this part about you, you know? You can always make me sound like the bad one here, when it’s you who’s overthinking. No offense, but it’s true. You gotta admit that.” Seungcheol pauses when Doyoon laughs softly beside him. “And for the record, I am _never_ going to date Junghan even if he was the last person on earth for me to date. No, this is not a love-hate relationship like things you get in dramas. It’s a hate-hate relationship and he has bluntly confessed he was actually being nice because his boyfriend took care of me and my band. Junghan never tells lies, though, so I believe on his words.”

“You know I’ve always preferred bad boys,” Doyoon chuckles. “I see, thank you for the complete explanation. Let’s go, we still have some work left to do.”

Seungcheol lets Doyoon leave first with a grin sitting on his face; the grin stays there even after Doyoon is swallowed by the busy crowd a moment later. Maybe he has stopped playing dumb, Seungcheol tells himself. And maybe he still has a lot of feelings for Doyoon, indeed, and he doesn’t have any intention to deny that. Maybe the painful two years of never being able to forget Doyoon was the sign that Seungcheol hadn’t completely kicked Doyoon out of his heart, he just absentmindedly buried him somewhere in the dark corner that he thought he would never come across again. And now, Seungcheol wonders if he should tell Junghan about this.

 

(Maybe he should, but not now.)

 

 

*****

 

 

The dinner for four happens a week after the entire shooting is wrapped up. Doyoon comes as promised, and it doesn’t take long for Junghan to realize there’s something going on between Seungcheol and Doyoon even before Seungcheol telling him anything. It’s Junghan, after all.

“I’m happy that the atmosphere here now is very much different than when we first met to discuss the video concept about three weeks ago. And it’s different in a good way,” says the fashion director. “I’m not going to say anything here, though. I’ll just wait for the good news.”

“I didn’t know you’re always this optimistic,” Doyoon comments. Junghan laughs, shrugging.

“So, are you two good, now?” Jisoo asks. Seungcheol and Doyoon look at each other, smiling. Seungcheol then nods to answer the question.

“It seems so,” Seungcheol says. “At least the situation isn’t as bad as it was when the project was first announced.”

“At least Seungcheol can stop looking at me with eyes full of rage,” Doyoon adds. “It’s hard to believe you didn’t hate me if you could see how you were looking at me.”

“Junghan said I looked at you and—” Seungcheol pauses. He can’t just say that Junghan said he looked at Doyoon with eyes full of love, or something along the line right in front of Doyoon’s face. “Never mind. It’s just the matter of perspective, I believe.”

Junghan bursts out laughing. “You know I don’t tell lies, Seungcheol. Maybe it really is a matter of perspective, after all.”

They chat for a while until Jisoo excuses himself from the table to answer a call and he comes back a moment later with gloomy face, saying he has to get back to the office as soon as possible because his work is waiting.

“Let’s go Junghan, you’re coming with me.” Jisoo says as he starts packing his belonging.

“Can’t I stay here a little longer?” Junghan whines, “I still want to dig deeper about these two horribly stubborn people!”

“No,” answers Jisoo. “Our director is looking for you, Chief Yoon. Remember that you’re not only looking after Spear Kings’ wardrobe, and now is the time to work.”

“Ugh, fineeee. Buy me chocolate on our way back?”

“Sure, baby.”

Jisoo gives Doyoon and Seungcheol an apologetic look. “I’m sorry we have to leave first, but we had enough fun today and would definitely sign up for another fun next time. Make sure your schedule is free when the time comes, okay?”

“It’s okay, Jisoo. Thank you for the meal. And you too, Junghan, I knew you worked the hardest to plan all of this,” Doyoon smiles.

“Because if I did not interfere, the magic would never happen,” Junghan rolls his eyes. “Anyway, I’m _still_ waiting for the good news. If you dare leave me out, I’m never going to forgive both of you.”

“Oh come on, like they have any other choice than to tell us first,” Jisoo tugs on Junghan’s sleeve impatiently. “Let’s go, baby. We’re going to be late and your favorite old man will scold us when we’re arrived.”

“He’s not my favorite old man!” protests Junghan.

“Of course he’s your favorite, anyone who knows you’re collecting NUDES is your favorite. Wasn’t that why he let you go to that brand’s product launching last month when our company was busy as heck?”

“Oh stop it. I know you’re jealous that the director knows my eye shadow collection better than you, my own boyfriend. Wasn’t that why you looked so pissed when I went to Maybelline’s product launching last month?”

 

 

“Junghan is collecting what?” asks Seungcheol, unsure with what he’s heard from the couple’s chitchat before they disappear behind the glass door. “I heard something like he’s collecting _nudes_ and hell, how could Jisoo be that calm knowing that weird hobby of his boyfriend?”

“Junghan is collecting Maybelline’s NUDES eye shadow palette,” answers Doyoon, holding back his laughter. “Junghan has loved the brand to the core for so long that he’s willing to leave everything behind to go to New York when the brand released something new. The eye shadow is apparently his favorite, I believe. I remember years ago Junghan complained at how bad he thought the formula was for Asian skin, and he even wrote a letter to the brand’s management. That’s just how much Junghan loved it, and he appreciated everyone who understood his obsession.”

“Oh my God, my poor Jisoo has involved himself with such a weird species,” Seungcheol mumbles. “Anyway Doyoonie, do you have anywhere to go after this?”

Doyoon shakes his head. “Not really, I’m pretty much free. Why?”

“Remember our promise last time?”

Doyoon frowns, “Is it about visiting your dorm?”

Seungcheol’s face lights up. “Oh, so you remember.”

“Of course, I missed our kids—” Doyoon stops abruptly and quickly corrects his word, “I mean, the kids. Yeah. I guess I’m just too used to refer to them that way.”

“You’re going to be the best surprise for them,” Seungcheol says, offering a hand to Doyoon. “Shall we go now?”

Doyoon takes the offer easily. “Yeah, let’s go.”

 

 

*****

 

 

Seungcheol will never forget the delighted face Soonyoung, Minghao and Mingyu show when they open the front door to see Doyoon standing there beside him. The three immediately launch themselves on Doyoon’s bodyto hug him, immediately forgetting they should’ve greeted their leader first. Seungcheol shakes his head, chuckling to himself. It does feel so nostalgic, though. The kids are always so enthusiast whenever Doyoon drops by, and Seungcheol knows how much they missed Doyoon after Doyoon stopped coming when they broke up two years ago.

“Guys, come on, let Doyoon in first. It’s cold outside.”

“Right,” Mingyu says, grinning so wide like he just won a lottery. “And welcome back, hyung. Sorry we forgot about you.”

“I’ve expected. Doyoon has always been your favorite,” Seungcheol says. “Are you guys happy? It’s supposed to be a surprise gift, so you won’t give me any excuse not to practice twice as hard as you do now.”

Minghao, Mingyu and Soonyoung groan in chorus. “That’s not a surprise gift, it’s a bribe.”

Seungcheol shrugs, “Still serves the same purpose. Do you wanna drink something, Doyoonie?”

Doyoon nods. “Just water is fine.”

“You can use the giant cup we put in the closet, hyung. We have a lot to talk with Doyoon-hyung so you need to make sure he won’t finish his drink in one go,” Soonyoung winks at Seungcheol. “And Doyoon-hyung, we have refill service too. Don’t think you can escape from this place easily.”

Doyoon glances at Seungcheol. The band leader smiles at him, so Doyoon smiles back.

“Don’t worry, kids. I’m not planning to leave so soon, anyway.”

 

 

 

When Seungcheol finds Doyoon again later with two cups of coffee on his hands—finally without the band members clinging on his side—it’s already so late to even offer him a ride home. Seungcheol has early schedule tomorrow, but he isn’t really sure how to tell Doyoon that, or how to tell him to stay the night. He thinks that it would be really awkward if Doyoon insists of going home.

But hey, life isn’t always as hard as he thought it would.

“Can you stay for tonight? It’s already so late and I don’t think it’s safe to let you go anywhere, not at this hour. And I can’t take you home because we have to go early tomorrow morning.”

Doyoon smiles comfortingly. “If that’s okay with you, I don’t mind,” he says. Seungcheol sighs in relief, and then he takes a seat beside Doyoon at the couch in the living room. “Coffee?” he hands Doyoon one of the cups. Doyoon accepts it, takes a short moment to inhale the scent of the freshly brewed coffee like he’s always done—and Seungcheol finds it adorable every time, even now. Memory is such a terrifying thing for human, _for God’s sake_.

“Remember you used to sit here when I stayed up late writing songs? You refused to sleep before I did, so we ended up sitting here until the sun rose and you would get angry at me because you had work and training in the morning. That, and you still had to make breakfast for us too before you leave.”

Doyoon laughs softly at the memory. “Yeah, I remember it very clearly. The kids wouldn’t let me go before we ate proper breakfast together and it almost felt like your dorm was my own place that I called home.”

“The kids told me they tried,” Seungcheol says.

“Tried what?”

“To make you feel like home when you’re here,” mumbles Seungcheol, smiling weakly. “I can’t deny the fact that you’re one of the most important things for Spear Kings, and I speak not just for me. You’re important for the kids, for the band itself. And that’s why I couldn’t hide how bad things were for me after you left me two years ago.”

Doyoon looks down, thumbs playing with the brim of the cup. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I guess I owe you an explanation?”

“Only if you want to share it with me,” Seungcheol shrugs. “I won’t ask if you don’t want to talk. I mean, I won’t force you. If you need more time until you’re ready, I’ll step back. I know it’s not easy, I will wait until you feel comfortable enough to talk about the past with me.”

“You have changed,” Doyoon says, smiling. “May I know why before I spill all the beans?”

“It’s just- I keep thinking about that time you told me you left because I didn’t give you any more reason to stay. The more I think about it, the more I think you’re right. I was selfish, you were selfless. Maybe that was why we couldn’t walk at the same pace and you were tired following me.”

Doyoon stares at the black liquid on his hand. “A few months before we broke up, my family was a total mess. My father was arrested for bribery and money launder practice, only a month after my brother was also arrested after the police found drugs in his possession. Those events blew my mother so hard and she had to be hospitalized. Everything was just... so hard, too hard for me to handle. And when I thought I should share it with you, you weren’t there, but you’re everywhere. Do you get it? It was the time when Spear Kings got the recognition you guys deserved, but at the same time your time was completely taken away from me. I was no longer a part of you, and what sadden me the most was the fact that you weren’t even realized that.”

Seungcheol blinks. He didn’t know; he never knew. What kind of bastard he was, really?

“I thought we needed a break until we could find ourselves again,” Doyoon continues. “But until the day I decided to end things between us, I could only see _me_ and _you_ , not _us_ anymore. I thought it was the sign that we couldn’t bring our relationship any further, so I gave up. Well, I thought I did.”

“You thought?” Seungcheol repeats. Doyoon nods.

“Yeah, so I thought it wouldn’t be a problem to work with you for the project. I didn’t expect to feel... a lot of _things_ when you were around, so I acted all tough and distant because I didn’t want to be the only one hoping. I’m sorry, I know what I did was foolish.”

“I am the one who should apologize,” Seungcheol sighs. “You were right about everything about our relationship. I fought so hard but it was for me, not for us, because I didn’t want to be alone and I thought you’d always stay no matter what but I never took your feeling into consideration. You were right, Doyoonie, and if anyone should hate someone at this rate, it should be you hating on me.”

Doyoon shakes his head slowly. “I would’ve done that from the very first day if I had the strength,” he whispers. “Junghan often scolds me, saying I’m a fool. I thought he said that because I tried too hard to move on and fail at that, but now I get that he said that because he knew all along I still loved you even now, but I was living in denial.”

“Junghan called me a fool several times, too,” Seungcheol admits, laughing softly. “Now I know he called me that for the exact same reason with you. I’m not surprised you’re the first to say the magic word, though, you’re always the bolder one between us.”

Doyoon looks up to meet Seungcheol’s eyes. There’s sincerity glistens on his black orbs and Seungcheol is glad he doesn’t see the reflecting pain anymore. It seems that their short talk has dissipated every scar and wound they had for the last two years, and now they can laugh at how foolish both of them were.

“So? Does this conversation lead to somewhere?” asks Doyoon.

“I hope you don’t mind that this conversation only leads to the conclusion of how much I want to kiss you right now.”

“Ah,” Doyoon clears his throat, face flushed. “Honestly, I was sort of hoping that you would say that.”

Seungcheol laughs. He shifts closer to Doyoon, holding his small face on his big hands. His thumbs stroke on the soft skin of Doyoon’s cheek, feeling the wave of nostalgia bubbling up through his chest. _This feels so right_ , Seungcheol tells himself as he tilts his head to shorten the distance between them, and he smiles on Doyoon’s lips when the other closes his eyes.

When Doyoon kisses back and the kiss is no longer just two pairs of lips pressed against each other—it’s more eager, hotter, _needier_ that Seungcheol needs to start breathing through his nose to keep the oxygen flowing on his blood—Seungcheol silently thanks the stupid butterflies on his stomach. God, love never felt so good.

 

(“I had no other boyfriend after you,” says Doyoon, matter-of-factly. He’s straddling Seungcheol’s waist with both legs crossing behind Seungcheol’s back and Seungcheol doesn’t seem to mind at that, at all.

“Really?” Seungcheol asks, grinning. “Good for you. Your taste is still as good as ever.”

Doyoon rolls his eyes, looking down with both hands cupping Seungcheol’s face. “I don’t know about you, though.”

Seungcheol leans up to meet Doyoon’s lips halfway. They share a long, lazy kiss until Doyoon pulls away first and lets Seungcheol embrace him warmly, the band’s leader burying his face in Doyoon’s hair and neck.

“I never had anyone after you, too,” his answer comes as a whisper. “Deep down, I’ve always realized that the most painful thing about our break up was trying to get rid of you, completely erasing you from my life. Believe it or not, I still have your number saved as _“Lover”_ on my phone, two years after you left.”

“How sweet,” Doyoon coos. “So I guess we can call ourselves official now, can’t we?”

Seungcheol steals a quick kiss from Doyoon, smiling so wide he could break his jaw. “Sure thing, my love.”)

 

 

*****

 

 

When Spear Kings’ new music video is finally released to public, it breaks the record as the most watched video in 24 hours; over 5 million viewers in several websites. The band have expected a wide range of response coming from fans and non-fans, claiming how they love the bravery of them telling a taboo topic in such a beautiful way. Some throw hate comments, of course, you can’t be liked by everyone no matter how good you try to be, but Seungcheol and his minions don’t really care. The video turns out really nice and Seungcheol now can’t argue with Junghan when he said his eyes screamed love when he looked at Doyoon.

Doyoon’s beautiful form is captured exquisitely under Choi Minki’s directing and Seungcheol thinks he can’t fall even deeper in love with that man, but in fact he does.

“Stop staring at the video like you want to eat Doyoon-hyung up,” Soonyoung says to him playfully, but his expression turns darker when he realizes what kind of look Seungcheol has on his face. “Hyung, oh my fucking God. You’re so disgusting. And a pervert. Oh my God.”

Seungcheol laughs. “I think my heart has had enough break, Soonyoung.”

Soonyoung smiles at him, “I’m happy for you, hyung. We’re so glad to see you’re back to your old self, when you’re simply happy for... being alive. You know what I mean. And it’s nice to see you’re in love again, Mingyu and I almost make a bet on how long you’ll hold on until you give up and decide to put your profile online to look for an instant date—” Soonyoung pauses when Seungcheol glares at him, “—which doesn’t need to happen now that you’re with Doyoon-hyung again, all happy and safe and sound.”

Seungcheol lets out a loud sigh. “I hate you guys,” he says.

Soonyoung grins. “You love us the most,” he tells the leader. “Anyway, we don’t have practice this afternoon so you can go and see your beloved one. How do I know? Of course I know because I am that nice to you, and also because Doyoon-hyung called when you were in the bathroom. He said he wanted to meet you.”

Seungcheol beams. “’kay then, I’m off. Please take care of the others while I’m gone and make sure Mingyu doesn’t burn anything at the kitchen.” Seungcheol grabs his coat beside him and strides across the room. “Soonyoung, I’m serious about Mingyu!” he warns the guitarist again.

Soonyoung snickers, waving his hand at Seungcheol. “Okay, okay, I get it. Have fun!”

 

 

*****

 

 

Seungcheol expects to see Doyoon open the door for him, and jumping on him for a hug or something. What he doesn’t expect to see at Doyoon’s apartment when he enters is, Doyoon sitting on the couch, one hand massaging his temple. On his other hand he’s holding a paper, and there are a lot more papers scattering around the floor.

“What are these?” Seungcheol asks, taking a seat beside Doyoon and presses a kiss on Doyoon’s temple, “Fan letters?”

“More like, hater letters,” Doyoon corrects him. “I got some this morning, and another batch yesterday. I thought it was some kind of prank, but not even a prank would get to this amount. People are throwing hate on me after your video is released; I guess that’s just how much people are jealous at me for having you all by myself on camera.”

“Do you want my company to sue them?” Seungcheol asks, worried.

“Who?”

Seungcheol shrugs, gesturing at the letters. “I don’t know, them?”

Doyoon laughs. “No, I’m used to this. I mean, this is sure not a nice thing, but I can handle this. I should be able to do this much if I want to stay as your boyfriend, because only God knows how _much more_ hate I would get in the future if public ever find out we’re dating.”

Seungcheol squints at his boyfriend. “Are you sure? If this turns out to be a more serious problem like stalking and death threatening, you know I won’t stay put. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I know, if this turns out to be a bigger problem in the future, I’ll tell you. I promise.” Doyoon throws away the paper on his hand dismissively and takes Seungcheol’s hand in his, bringing it up to his cheek. “I won’t repeat my mistake in the past, Seungcheol, I promise. I’ll never leave without explanation anymore, I’ll try to be more considerate, and I’ll make up for the last two years I didn’t spend with you.”

Seungcheol caresses Doyoon’s face softly, smiling. “I know. I believe you.”

“And, do you believe me that I can take care of this matter quietly? Because if your company is involved, Junghan will never shut up about this for three months straight and it will worsen the situation. Don’t try to defend him because you know it’s true.”

“That... I can’t disagree,” Seungcheol laughs. He pulls Doyoon closer, hugging his slim figure from the side and resting his chin on the other’s shoulder. “Honestly, I’m thinking about making a press conference to come out publicly. I was afraid something like this would happen to you and I was right, see? I want everyone to know that if they want to mess with you, they have to fight me first.”

“Don’t think too much about me,” Doyoon clicks his tongue. “I can take care of myself pretty well, and I’m your boyfriend, not your kid.”

“I still want them to know that you’re the one I love,” Seungcheol pouts. “But okay, press conference can wait. How about doing it after we got married? Those haters would be in another level of shock, ha.”

“Oh my God, you’re so annoying.” Doyoon says and shakes his head, but he’s laughing with that laughter Seungcheol doesn’t know he missed so much. “Whatever, I don’t want to get involved in your weird plan. Now help me cleaning up so we can watch movies.”

“Ay, ay,” Seungcheol untangles his arms around Doyoon’s body and smooches his cheek loudly before he gets up to collect the papers. Seungcheol glances at the insulting words written on the papers, clicking his tongue. “Doyoonie, do we burn them up or just put them on the trash bin?” he shouts to his boyfriend, who's already leaving the living room.

“Whichever one you like,” Doyoon responds from the kitchen. “But if you’re really that upset, I have lighters on the top drawer beside the couch.”

Seungcheol laughs, Doyoon still knows him best.

 

 

There are some things that just don’t change no matter how the circumstance is, and Seungcheol is glad one of them is him and Doyoon, as a whole. They are not perfect, but they believe in each other enough to go for a second chance, to fix what’s broken and to heal each other’s wound. They have forever to make up for the last bitter two years, and they know they will never run out of time to be happy this time.

And with that, Seungcheol is ready to start his new journey of _forever_ with his same, old love. He doesn’t need anyone else, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Epilogue
> 
> "So, you'll never going to tell Seungcheol and Doyoon that you were the one who suggested Director Choi to pair them up? That basically you're the reason this whole event happened?" Jisoo asks.
> 
> Junghan shakes his head, grinning. "Nope, I like it better this way. Anyway, they're happy now, and that's all that matters. Isn't it? Now let's choose your tie, baby, Director Choi is waiting to have an exclusive dinner with us."


End file.
